Friday, March 21, 2008

I want to see Jesus

I just watched Passion of the Christ with my parents tonight. I've watched it several times, but I am so amazed at how much Jesus went through to save us. And even if I was the only sinner in the world, He would still save us. I don't understand how someone could resist Christ's willingness to suffer for their sins. I don't understand WHY Christ would suffer for MY sins. I have done NOTHING to deserve His love and forgiveness. Sure I am nice some of the time, and go to church most of the time, but inside my very core is wickedness that is not worthy of anyone's blood being shed for me. My thoughts are evil. Why would Jesus save me? Why? Oh man h0w I love Him. I stop and think sometimes who, what, and where I would be if I didn't have Jesus. The very thought brings tears to my eyes and an extreme gratefullness that I cannot explain takes over me. Oh how I love Him. Today, two thousand years ago, he died for me. For you. For all of humanity. And why? Because
for God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.John 3:16
He did it because He LOVED ME. WOW.
After I saw the movie I told my parents I want to see Jesus. I can't wait until I can be forever at peace in the presence of my Savior.

Monday, March 17, 2008

And ....depression sets in.

All the rehearsals, all the performances for Much Ado About Nothing are over. Its like Mr L says-it all disappears into air...bittersweet and beautiful...that is theater for you.

I made and improved a lot of friendships in the play this year. I am going to miss it A LOT. And I'm not looking forward to going back to my seemingly mundane life. I just feel like crying. I don't think I could do Hollywood or even Ashland because I hate saying goodbye. I want to relive it again and again. It went by so fast...too fast. And it makes me frustrated that it went by so fast. It happens every year. 9 weeks of rehearsals...working hard with lines...making friends...and then BANG all in one day two performances...a cast party the same evening...and then...just like that...gone. What if this was my last year doing the plays? Then it will forever be gone.
God will get me through. God doesn't want me this low. He has prepared more for me than just 3 months of great play rehearsals...lots of laughs and comradery. I have my whole life ahead of me...I have more exciting things to look forward too...ultimately leading up to eternity with my Jesus...where nothing is gone and everything lasts forever.